Here in Katie’s Head

Dear Wichita drivers,

There was a blizzard today, the snow plows were MIA, but we had stuff to get done. So many of us hit the roads.

We are notorious for being bad drivers, but FUCKING HELL, MUST YOU ALWAYS JUMP AT THE CHANCE TO REINFORCE A STEREOTYPE?

Yeah, I was out on the roads. But I know how fast to drive during a snow storm (slower than your dead grandma) and how close to follow other cars (if you see other cars, you are too close).

The rest of you (especially douchebags in trucks who don’t have the patience for those of us without four-wheel drive, and also the Riverside asshole tailing me on the way home), need a refresher course in Kansas driving laws.

First, the Kansas Basic Speed Law:

Kansas speed regulations start with the basic rule that the speed of a vehicle has to be reasonable and prudent for existing conditions. Even when the posted speed limit is 70 mph, it may be safe to go 45 mph due to heavy rain, snow, ice, or blowing dust.

Second, following distance:

Kansas law requires drivers to follow other vehicles at a reasonable and prudent distance, taking into consideration the speed of the vehicles and condition of the roadway.

Four of every 10 crashes involve rear-end collisions, usually because someone is following too closely (tailgating). Leave enough room between your vehicle and the one ahead so you can stop safely if the other vehicle stops suddenly.

Brake early and gently when preparing to stop or turn. It gives drivers behind you plenty of warning that you are slowing down. Be aware of space on either side of you, too, in case you have to change lanes quickly or pull over to avoid a hazard. If possible, leave yourself some escape room to your left and right.

And if you can’t understand or remember all of that, if you ever find yourself on a snow-packed road behind a silver Saturn with an Apple logo sticker in the back window going 20 mph, BACK THE FUCK OFF.

Lividly yours,

Katie

Posted: 11:44 pm · Category: Weather, Wichita · Comments: 1

We’re supposed to hit a record high in Wichita today (79!) and then get snow two days later.

I only enjoy the first snow each year. The snow you get when you’ve forgotten about the pains of snow shoveling, driving on icy roads, trying to figure out where the lines in the parking lot are, etc., is a lot more tolerable than the next snow. By then you’ve recalled that snow is not pretty, it’s a huge pain in the ass.

So I would like to politely request that the first snow gets postponed until a day when fewer people are on the road. Preferably a day when I don’t have to drive to/from work. If it could snow while I’m away on vacation, that’d be great.

Don’t snow on a too-warm day when it’ll melt immediately. That’s a waste of the tolerable first snow.

Posted: 8:07 am · Category: Weather · Comments: None

The plan was to drive up to Lawrence this morning, get lunch, shop, drink, hangout at the Bottleneck, crash at a friend’s place and drive back the next morning.

But it started snowing.

We hit the road a little after 10 a.m. and the quickly changed our minds.

So we turned back and had, I think, a lot of fun right here in Wichita.

First was breakfast at Riverside Cafe. Despite driving past it countless times, I hadn’t ever actually eaten there. Not bad. Awesome waitress.

Then bowling. None of us bowled anything worth boasting about, but I…well, it wasn’t my worst performance, at least.

Then a tour of random Wichita bars. I never realized how damn many bars there are here.

In short, today was not what I expected but still awesome.

Tomorrow, I may build myself a snowman. This snow is too great to let it go to waste.

Posted: 8:02 pm · Category: Misc Friends, Weather, Wichita · Comments: 1

This weekend, I was pissed that I had to turn my air conditioner back on.

Today, I was pissed that I had to turn my furnace on.

I think my thermostat is broken. It said 68 degrees tonight around dinner time. Colder than I’d normally keep it inside, but not frosty either. So why was I shivering?

I turned the furnace on, set the thermostat for 73 degrees. Now, three hours and a few furnace cycles later, the thermostat claims it’s 80 degrees. My ass.

My feet are still icicles. I’m still sitting here wrapped in a fleece blanket.

So I call shenanigans on the thermostat. And maybe on the furnace, too. And definitely on my totally non-insulating body fat.

I miss living in an apartment with stable temperatures and no leaky windows.

Posted: 10:19 pm · Category: Weather · Comments: None

People have always told me how much I look, talk and act like my mother. Grandma always calls me by Mom’s name — and usually doesn’t catch her mistake. When I met my boss at my internship this summer, he stared at me for several second before saying, “You look just like your mother” — he’d worked with her when she was my age.

And now that I’m living my Psuedo Grown Up life, playing house with my fiancé, it’s striking how much the maternal (or just domestic?) instinct has kicked in. I never used to care if there were dishes in the sink — now it drives me crazy. I’m actually buying groceries before I get hungry. I have favorite brands of cleaning products.

And I just got off the phone with Q, warning him to be careful when driving home tonight.

“Be careful on Naismith, because the mailman told me that it floods and carries cars off into the creek…but don’t go around to Ousdahl, it’s the worst. It gets really deep. If it’s deep enough that you can’t tell how deep it is, don’t go through it. I don’t want you floating off into the creek.”

I think it was actually my dad who gave me the driving-in-floods lecture, but the rest of my yet-underdeveloped homemaking skills come from Mom.

If only I could get Q trained as well Mom has trained Dad, then I’d be a happy woman.

(Sweetheart, thanks for making the bed.)

Posted: 10:43 pm · Category: About Me, Family, Weather · Tags: cleaning, growing up, mom · Comments: 4

After a week in Fort Scott with Q, I returned to an electricity-less home in Wichita.

Today is Day Five and we still don’t have power. It may be several more days. We are not in a “priority zone” despite being in the middle of town.

Please send hate mail to Westar on my behalf. It’s really cold and I miss heat.

Posted: 11:32 am · Category: Status, Weather, Wichita · Comments: 2

It’s amazing how the right walk in the right weather with the right iPod soundtrack can make the stress melt away into something so right.

I was walking out of the bank, having deposited the Christmas money that’ll soothe my shriveling account balance. Somehow the iPod, having reached the end of the album I’d been listening to, decided that rather than going silent, it would play just the playlist I needed to hear. And as the beats synched perfectly with my steps and the sun came out and yesterday — yesterday, when I wanted to cry because, Christ, what was I thinking when I thought I could break old habits? — was so very, very far away from me now.

It’s a good day to be alive.

ETA: And Quinton’s bought us tickets to see David Sedaris in April.

Posted: 1:01 pm · Category: Status, Weather · Comments: 5