Woozy
Back in August, I developed this weird, swirly vertigo problem out of nowhere.
I decided it was a brain tumor. The doctor at the urgent care clinic assured me that it was sinus-related even though the evidence for that was rather weak. (Yes, I should have seen a real doctor, but it was a Sunday, I couldn’t walk a straight line, and there was nowhere else to go, so whatever.)
She gave me some anti-dizziness medication that worked by putting me to sleep for 36 hours. Fucking useful, right? She also gave me a bottle of Flonase, which only worked because I am EXCEEDINGLY susceptible to the placebo effect (this is why I’m drunk after one beer), and once I realized it wasn’t really working, it quit working at all.
And then in early September, let’s just say I had a really good cry, which seemed to clear out my sinuses and the vertigo vanished.
But because Katie would cease to be Katie without her allergies, the sinuses refilled themselves and the vertigo returned, too.
When I lie down in bed, or tip my head all the way back, or have a really good yawn or sometimes for no reason at all, everything gets a little swirly for a bit. I keep thinking I should go back to the doctor and get them to actually take it seriously (because my inner hypochondriac is putting even odds on brain tumor and high blood pressure) instead of hurriedly writing a scrip and sending me on my way.
But I’ve reconsidered. Because it is the cheapest, most reliable high to just lean waaaay back in my chair let things spin for a second. I’m starting to enjoy it. This is what they were talking about in elementary school when they told us that drugs are bad and we should find a natural high, right?
Because this is all-natural and it’s awesome.
