Because after three glasses of wine at the snooty wine bar (and I saw the owner skulking around wondering why there weren’t more people there — duh, IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE TOO ELITE FOR THE WICHITARDS), I desperately needed to google “wombat” so I could show my new drinking buddies what a wombat looks like.
Thank you, Steve Jobs.
Also, I should have used the iPhone tip calculator because after three glasses of wine, 20% of anything is always five dollars.
Posted: 10:02 pm ·
Category: Drunk, Misc Friends ·
Comments: 2
A kernel of inspiration + two beers + the company of friends = solutions for all my problems.
Posted: 9:55 pm ·
Category: Drunk ·
Comments: None
I knew my allergies were about to catch up on me Saturday night, so I was considering not drinking at all.
But after hearing that I tend to get a bit silly after three drinks, Randy talked me into drinking some wine. And he poured me a big glass. And then Carrie insisted that everyone try her peppermintinis. And then, when I really wanted a glass of water, Brent insisted I drink one of his beers.
And after all that, I apparently took this picture of myself in Deb’s bathroom. I didn’t remember that until I found it on my phone tonight.
Wow. I totally don’t look drunk at all. Ha!
I left after a long argument over whether “Ray Ray” Robinson will be convicted. In case you ever wondered, that is what journalists talk about at parties.
Posted: 11:38 pm ·
Category: Drunk, Misc Friends ·
Comments: 1
Today at work, a desk neighbor told me, “You have moves, and speed.”
Providing the context might mitigate the compliment, so I just want you to know that I have third-party verification of my moves. And speed.
The fact that my moves and speed were put to use in a donut-aquisition mission is irrelevant.
Also, Evan: the forth glass of wine was unnecessary, but probably of little consequence. Have fun in Tallahassee. Yay, two weeks left. Also, remind me to update you on my spring break options.
Posted: 11:12 pm ·
Category: Drunk, Work ·
Comments: None
Since the first time I got good and drunk at a house party (man, that was an awesome night), I’ve noticed a sort of post-drinking halo effect.
For about a week post-drinking, I’m just in a really good mood. The kind of mood where you want to go up to people at work and give them a big hug and then go back to whatever you were doing. And where every nice thing that someone does for me is just, wow, so incredibly touching.
This is probably further proof of a brain tumor, which has clearly fucked up my brain chemistry.
But it’s nice.
So I’m sober now, but I still love everyone.
Don’t worry, though. Next week I’ll be back to hating everyone.
Posted: 10:56 pm ·
Category: Drunk, Theories ·
Comments: 1
In retrospect, I should have started with the Long Island ice tea, not ended with it.
Another observation: typing? Quite difficult considering how very, very, very drunk I am right now.
GOD BLESS THE DELETE KEY!
As I type, deleting at least SIX CHARACTERS for every character I DON’T delete, Stephanie is watching over my shoulder and laughing uncontrollably. She says she can control it, but only for about three seconds in my estimation. Also, she must sing while she is not laughing. Or she has to make a snorting noise. Do you know my friend Stephanie? She had had her senior recital tonight, and we celebrated. Like whoa. She says, “Like whoa? You said, ‘Like whoa!’ Oh my god, I’m too drunk. No no don’t write that because I’m gonna be a teacher, and they might see that. YOU’RE WRITING EVERYRTHING I SAY!”
Also, I have the hic hiccups. It’s cliche, but true.
And also, I love everyone. Especially you.
Posted: 2:07 am ·
Category: Drunk, Misc Friends, Status ·
Comments: 1
