I realized today that when my sisters and I start having kids of our own, we can have our own Thanksgiving dinners apart from the extended family we currently struggle to tolerate.
I am suddenly more excited about the future.
Dear Victoria’s Secret Bra Designers,
Thank you for making lots of really cute bras. I have several of yours and for the most part, I enjoy them. I have a black t-shirt bra that is not only super comfy, but really seems to get guys’ attention. The first time I wore it, a guy friend looked me up and down and yelled, “damn!” I think if there is a desired effect of a bra besides just keeping the ladies supported, this is probably it.
I would, however, like to register a complaint on behalf of my boyfriend. You see, in the…uh…heat of the moment, bra clasps are REALLY hard to undo. This is fine for ugly old matronly bras, but for Victoria’s Secret bras, this is a big problem.
See, if you make a sexy bra, there are some assumptions to be made. If a woman wears a sexy bra, it’s probably because she’s expecting a guy to see her in it. She ain’t dressing up her boobies just to keep it to herself. So when this guy is in a situation where he gets to see her in this bra, the next step is often to remove said bra. So, within my personal logic, it makes sense that sexy-looking bras should be easy to unhook since they will probably be in a situation that may require a speedy, possibly one-handed removal.
And the teeny tiny hooks that are used in most bras, well, they’re no walk in the park. I understand that it gets easier with practice, but I’ve been wearing bras for quite some time and I still have problems myself sometimes.
Perhaps the invention of the front-closure bra was a product of bra-unhooking frustration. I’ve owned one or two of these contraptions in my day, but I have to say I don’t think that solve the problem. For one, it’s confusing, because the clasp is opposite of where one would expect it to be. Also, it’s often a completely different type of clasp. Just when men have started to figure out a traditional bra clasp, you throw a completely alien fastener at them. Not only this, but these untraditional fasteners come in a wide variety of types, giving no consistency. This only makes the problem worse!
I’d suggest trying a different type of fastener, in the back, and make it something intuitive. Maybe snaps? They’d be easily unsnapped, should hold fairly well, and wouldn’t dig into my back. Or something else. I don’t care, as long as it works and is guy-friendly.
Your efforts to improve the ease of bra-removal by redesign of the traditional bra clasp will be greatly appreciated.
Sincerely,
Katie
I remember when Dorothy [the crazy art dealer in Wichita] hired me to manage her website, update when paintings got sold, fix her computer when it turned to the darkside, managing her mailing list database, etc…
I was sure that this was the starting point. This was the job where I’d actually first get paid for doing something I love.
And then, it slowly started to drive me insane.
Well, at this point, I need a job again. And I’d like it to be another job that starts off all magical and idyllic, even if it ends up driving me insane in the end. I mean, the office drove me insane from the start. And I stayed there over two years, being smart and innovative and putting up with all the bullshit they put me through. I worked for 26 months at a desk job where I never had my own desk. That, my friends, is a devoted worker.
My bank account would really, really appreciate it if I went back to being a well paid, under appreciated, charmingly quirky worker once more. Since I’ve finally got an idea of my schedule for next semester, I’m starting to look around.
The Kansan is looking for “web assistants,” so I’ve sent an email to their web editor asking for more info. And if that doesn’t pan out, well, I’ll just have to look up my sleeve for something else to pull out.
My friend Sammy [lives across the hall, really cool girl] and her boyfriend broke up last night.
And so what is my cheer-up strategy? Junk food and voodoo!
I’d just gotten a voodoo doll kit from Mom for my birthday [yeah, I thought it was weird too, but I was still happy]. So we take out the doll, tape one of Jared’s guitar picks to the back and Sammy beat the living shit out of it. So about 11 PM last night, Jared should have felt chest pains, a grinding stomach ache, a prick in the leg, a sharp pain in the groin, and the worst headache of his life.
And after that, she’d stopped crying and looked like she was feeling a lot better.
So boys beware, if you break any of my girl friends’ hearts, you’re gonna pay.
In related news, if there are any 18-21 year old cute, sensitive, guitar playing guys in the area, I know a really awesome girl who’d love to meet you.
My first MeFi thread is actually sparking conversation. I’m so proud!
Paper Due: 9:30 AM
Paper Started: 6:42 AM
Breaks Taken: 3
Paper Finished and Printed: 8:04 AM
Grade I got last time I pulled this: A-
Time of first class today: 8:30 AM
The most important thing I learned in 9 years of accelerated curriculum is how to procrastinate to the fullest of my ability. How to lie effectively comes in second.
Oh, that’s unfortunate. While simultaneously feeling sorry for Griff, I would like to complain that as a Girl Scout, I never got to pick my own name or get a shirt with said name on it.
Of course, I was in the apathy troop. Not one of us completed, or even started, a badge in 3 years.
I often think of
the sweet gig I could have right
now. Cue the facepalm.
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